Sunday, December 31, 2017

Onto the next year!

The year is a couple hours from being over and that can only mean one thing...

It's time for the annual year-in-review blogpost!

I know I haven't blogged very much this year but here's every entry over the past twelve months organized just for you.


(1-22-17) Eight and counting.


(2-14-17) Love today!


(4-15-17) I could be the one.


(5-31-17) Purple couch!


(6-10-17) It's time to celebrate!!!


(7-25-17) Happy Halloween!!


(8-26-17) Condo anniversary!!
(8-29-17) A crafty anniversary!


(9-20-17) Six years going on seven.


(10-30-17) Call me Mother (Plant).


(11-23-17) "Don't lose your creative outlet!"


(12-28-17) New beginnings.
(12-31-17) Onto the next year!

Most of 2017 was pretty uneventful for me, unless you consider buying a couch an "event". I spent the past twelve months working and being alone and lonely--I only went on three (unsuccessful) dates this year.

I really don't do New Year's resolutions anymore but I would like to incorporate creativity and art into my life again. I'd say it'd also be nice to go on more dates in 2018 but I can't control gay men's lack of interest so I won't get my hopes up.

We shall see what happens though.

May the coming year be AMAZING for all of us. 

***Happy New Year, everyone!!***

Thursday, December 28, 2017

New beginnings.

It always begins the same.

New growth, then a single leaf. 

Outstretched. Ready to explore.

And this is how it starts.

Thursday, November 23, 2017

"Don't lose your creative outlet!"

Turkey. Overeating. Time with family.

Thanksgiving is here!

Image result for charlie brown thanksgiving gif

I spent most of the day catching up with my mom, aunts, and brothers--putting on several pounds via mashed potatoes and stuffing.

I made it a point to text everyone on my phone's contact list this morning, wishing them a happy holiday with their families. One in particular was a former coworker at the crafts store I work at. She ended up getting a job with Corporate and now lives in another state.

She replied back asking how I was doing. I mentioned I'm mostly working a lot and haven't really drawn or painted much (at all) over the past couple of years.

"Don't lose your creative outlet!" she warned. "You need that."

I knew she'd understand since she comes from an art background as well.

I haven't forgotten my life as an artist but I certainly have buried it very deep. It's so hidden, I often wonder if it's gone forever.

You'd think something so simple as picking up a pencil or a paintbrush would be easy but for me it's not.

I will heed my former coworker's advice though. Somehow, someway, I have to become an artist again.

I'm just thankful to still have the opportunity to try.

Happy Thanksgiving to you and your family, everyone!!

Monday, October 30, 2017

Call me Mother (Plant).

Epipremnum aureum

Commonly called Pothos and Devil's Ivy. 

It was the first houseplant I ever had...and it's still alive to this day. 

Someone gave it to my dad over 25 years ago and judging by the red and green weaved basket it came in, the plant was probably a Christmas gift. 

That makes sense because it was abandoned in an unheated part of the house (that we used for storage). I remember spotting it as a child--surprised it was still alive during the wintertime. I gave it some water (every now and then) and in the weeks that followed, I moved the plant into the main living room. 

My mom saw I took an interest in the plant and she ended up buying a small little houseplant from the grocery store as its companion. Then another (and then another) would follow. That's why I call it my "Mother Plant", not only because it was my very first plant but it led to all the others I acquired over the years.

When I moved out of my family's home over two years ago, the Mother Plant was the first thing I took with me. I could never leave it behind. It then came with me when I bought my condo last year

I probably didn't keep up with its maintenance as often as I should have (due to working so much) and I slowly saw my very first houseplant looking rather sickly over these past few months. 

So I did the unthinkable. I cut down the Mother Plant all the way to its start again. 

Here's my Mother Plant now...

 Bare and naked.

Now mind you, I could've easily rooted the cuttings trailing the floor and added them to the pot but I want the plant's original root systems to be producing the leaves, not its "children". 

Its roots are intact and it's a very resilient plant. I have faith it'll grow once more. "Come back to me," I whispered. 

Now to sit and wait for it to return to its former glory. 

This one's dedicated to you, Mother Plant...

Wednesday, September 20, 2017

Six years going on seven.

Today marks six years of working at my university night-job and I’m happy about that.

It’s a place where work doesn’t feel like work and I actually look forward to going there.

 My work computer. Don't you love my desktop image?

Due to the university's budget issues, there won't be chances of advancement anytime soon but I’m grateful to be part of this team. To see my student workers grow and spread their wings and then help train incoming students that will take their place. They’ve helped me more than they know. 

So before my workday ends, I just wanted to say… 

Happy Anniversary, university night-job!!

Tuesday, August 29, 2017

A crafty anniversary!

I’m not sure how much of an anniversary it is now that I'm just there on Sundays, but today marks my seventh year working at the arts-and-crafts store! 

I've seen this company change and evolve over the years, mostly for the better. 

We’ve had four district managers, four store managers, and five assistant store managers come and go during my time here. I went from being the newest employee to becoming one of the senior-most members. That just seems crazy to me that I “outlived” so many managers and fellow associates.


I steadily grew into my role over the years and eventually mastered and surpassed it. Even though the job is still quite frustrating, I know I can handle it because I've been doing just that.

Time will tell how much longer I'm there but for now...

Happy Anniversary, arts-and-crafts store job!!

Saturday, August 26, 2017

Condo anniversary!!

This particular day came faster than expected. I guess one loses a sense of time when working so much. But still an important date to remember.

Today marks the one-year anniversary that I officially bought my condo!

I'm embarrassed to say I still don't have any art on the walls and am still in need of a coffee table but at least I have a place to rest and recover and call my own.

I spent most of the day being a homebody. Cooking for myself, cleaning, watching TV, and taking care of my many houseplants. What better way to honor this space than to use it, right?

 Just some of my houseplants.  :)

While I don't think this will be a place I'll live for the rest of my life, it serves its purpose for now and I'm thankful to have it. It beats renting any day!

So with that said...

Happy Anniversary, dear condo! I'm glad to own you!

Tuesday, July 25, 2017

Happy Halloween!!

I heard wicked laughter while putting up the store's price-change labels over the weekend.

Was the arts-and-crafts store I work at mocking me?

From around the corner between the wedding section and the candle aisle, I spotted the source.

A full-blown Halloween display, complete with flashing lights and ghoulish sound effects!

Already? It's still July.

But that's retail for you. You know it's a sure sign the holiday shopping season is slowly rearing its ugly head.

Thank God I only work there on Sundays now and will be avoiding most of it.

So Happy Halloween, everyone!! Be safe if you're out trick-or-treating...three months from now.


Saturday, June 10, 2017

It's time to celebrate!!!

Familiar faces leaving.

Moving on to new cities, to new jobs, on to bigger and better things.

It's bittersweet for sure.

Here at the university I work for, students are finishing up their final exams for the year and many are preparing for graduation.

That can only mean one thing.

It's time to CELEBRATE!!!

I wanted to give the student workers at my (second) university job a big send-off and thank you for all their hard work this academic school year.

The counter in the back office space was transformed into an abundant potluck party.



I tried making it as colorful and festive as I could. Bold signage, metallic fringe, and bright floral garland among bags of chips, candy, and cake.


It was fun livening up an otherwise dull space. It was also a much-needed moment to create and play with color and patterns and textures. And it helped bring us all together over some good old-fashioned junk food.

Congrats to this year's graduates! May you all go FAR!!

Wednesday, May 31, 2017

Purple couch!

These things always seem like mini milestones for some reason, even though they're probably not.

I moved into my very own condo nine months ago but besides my bed and dining room table, I didn't really have any furniture to sit on.

My previous place was a small studio so a couch never seemed necessary. Now that I own a one-bedroom, well, there's a big space in the living room begging for seating.

That's all changed though because I purchased a couch and it arrived two weeks ago!

It's my first couch. Ever. Like a proud sofa dad, I must show it off!

The walls in my condo are warm oranges and peach tones (that's how the previous owner had it) so I wanted the sofa to pop against such dominant colors.

I chose a lovely purple.

Not a Barney purple. My couch has more blue in it.

Not quite, Barney.

Almost like a Prince purple but deeper.


Here it is.....

It's a three-seater but the end has a chaise lounge built in so I can rest after a long day's work. And now if I ever have company, they'll have a place to (properly) sit.

I still don't have artwork on the walls (yet), and I feel there's still much decorating to do, but this couch will help make my place a little more like a home.

Saturday, April 15, 2017

I could be the one.

It was the spur of the moment. 

He flew all the way from his country to see me late last month. 

It was for less than a week--like a drawn-out daydream. 

We talked about life and love. Our families, our past, what we want for the future. 

There's no denying there's something there. How long will we dance this dance? Will we ever see it through? 

If he would just give me his heart completely...I think I could be the one. 

"I see the moon
I see the moon 
I see the moon 
Oh when you're looking at the sun
Not a fool 
Not a fool 
Not a fool 
No, you're not fooling anyone 

Oh but when you're gone
When you're gone 
When you're gone 
Oh, baby, all the lights go out 
Thinking oh that, baby, I was wrong
I was wrong
I was wrong 
Come back to me, baby, we can work this out 

Oh baby come on, let me get to know you
Just another chance so that I can show 
That I won't let you down, oh no 
No, I won't let you down, oh no 
'Cause I could be the one 
I could be the one 
I could be the one 
I could be the one 

I see in blue 
I see in blue 
I see in blue 
Oh and you see everything in red 
And there's nothing that I wanna do for you 
Do for you 
Do for you 
Oh 'cause you got inside my head

Oh but when you're gone 
When you're gone 
When you're gone 
Oh, baby, all the lights go out 
Thinking oh that, baby, I was wrong 
I was wrong 
I was wrong 
Come back to me, baby, we can work this out 

Oh baby come on, let me get to know you 
Just another chance so that I can show 
That I won't let you down, oh no 
No, I won't let you down, oh no 
'Cause I could be the one
I could be the one 

I could be the one
Be the one, be the one 
Be the one, be the one 
Be the one, be the one 
I could be the one 
Be the one, be the one 
Be the one, be the one 
Be the one, be the one 
I could be the one 
Be the one, be the one 
Be the one, be the one 
Be the one, be the one 
I could be the one 
Be the one, be the one 
Be the one, be the one 
Will you be mine? 

Oh baby come on, let me get to know you 
Just another chance so that I can show 
That I won't let you down, oh no 
No, I won't let you down, oh no 
'Cause I could be the one 
I could be the one 
I could be the one."

Tuesday, February 14, 2017

Love today!

You'd think today of all days would depress me the most. 

I've been painfully single most of my adult life except for a few brief stints here and there. And yet I still believe in love and am happy for those that have it and have had it. They are truly blessed. 

Everybody's gonna love today!

My heart remains very full and hopeful, even if I have no one to give it to. I know love is a powerful, transformative force that can and should last a lifetime. 

So even though I am very much alone and often very lonely, I still celebrate today. I still celebrate love!!! 

Happy (St.) Valentine's Day, everyone!!

Sunday, January 22, 2017

Eight and counting.

I've been so busy with work that I almost forgot about today. Today is Exploding Doughnut's eight-year anniversary!! 

I don't know how many people read my blog anymore but I wanted to take a moment to acknowledge making it yet another year in the blogosphere. 

Thanks to everyone that continues checking out what I'm posting on here. It means more than you know. 

 ***Happy Anniversary, Exploding Doughnut!!***

Saturday, December 31, 2016

This year.

Wow, 2016 flew by FAST but I'm kind of glad. It's been a lonely and often sad year for me.

There were a few highlights though. Most notably was buying my first-ever condo.

What about the rest of the year, you ask? Well, here's your chance to find out!

Every blogpost from 2016 has been neatly listed for you to re-read or check out for the first time.

Here we go!


(1-9-16) (You're) so far away.
(1-15-16) The end of an era.
(1-22-16) Celebrate!!


(2-12-16) Asha's art.
(2-14-16) One day.


(3-31-16) Keeping up!


(4-6-16) A year on the phones.
(4-11-16) Opening Night!
(4-28-16) Nominated!
(4-30-16) Not worth celebrating.


(5-4-16) Finally!!!!!
(5-31-16) Two-weeks notice...almost!


(6-23-16) "You'll just have to live with it."


(7-4-16) I never thought I could feel so free.
(7-31-16) Two-weeks notice almost...extended!!


(8-20-16) Lost love.
(8-26-16) Property Owner!!
(8-29-16) Not going anywhere!
(8-31-16) One last time...


(9-5-16) Red, Gold, and Green.
(9-20-16) Five years going on strong.


(10-9-16) Fruits of my labor.


(11-1-16) Happy Anniversary to her.
(11-4-16) Hey Chicago, what do you say?


(12-11-16) Extension denied.
(12-29-16) Mentor.
(12-31-16) This year.

And there you have it.

I no longer have New Year's goals/resolutions but the things I'd like to focus on this coming year include:

- Continuing to decorate/furnish my condo so it becomes a real home and haven.
- Exercise on a more consistent basis.
- Create art again!

We'll see what 2017 brings. May it be GREAT for all of you.

Happy New Year, everyone!!

Thursday, December 29, 2016


Mentor To serve as a trusted advisor or guide. To train. To impart skills or knowledge to. 

A couple vacancies recently opened up at my call center university jobTwo part-timers were hired to fill those slots. I was pulled aside by the department head and asked (along with another coworker) to be the newbies' mentor. 

Why me? I thought. I'm just part-time myself and have only been there over a year-and-a-half. Some call center agents have been there for five and six years. 

I was told it's because out of everyone, me and the other agent are the most even-keeled on the phones and we follow protocol. He wants the new hires to learn the correct way to answer the phones. 

A part of me was annoyed. 

A full-time opening in our department was available a couple months back but another part-timer was picked over me. And with my other part-time university position (night job), I work 40 hours each week but without full-time benefits. 

It's just another way I'm being taken advantage of. 

And yet, I was quite flattered and proud to be chosen to help train the new crew. Everyone has been very supportive and kind to me in both departments and this is a way to pay that forward. 

So for the next six weeks, each new call center agent will sit with me (and our other coworker), listening in on and observing our phone calls. I'll show them as much as I can and help them so their transition on the phones will be an easy one. We'll see how it goes.

Time to mentor!

Sunday, December 11, 2016

Extension denied.

Denied tr.v. Declined to grant or allow; refused.

I knew the time would come but I was hoping for at least one more year.

Four years ago, I interviewed for a city department in Seattle. It was part of their continual recruitment process that granted those living out-of-state (such as myself) the ability to apply to their in-house openings.

I was accepted into their program and landed a couple job interviews along the way but was never picked. At the twelve-month mark I asked for an extension (the exclusive access expires after a year) and it was granted again and again…and again.

The last extension expired last month and when I asked for another extension, it was denied. I reached the maximum amount of renewals.

It was disappointing but rules are rules. They were gracious enough to let me stay in the system for as long as they have.

I'm losing the dream of being able to run away to Seattle, knowing I had a good way of landing a job there. It's that "way out" that I'm mourning.

HR told me I could reapply for the continual recruitment process when it opens up again next year so at least that's something.

Deep in my heart I still feel like I was meant to be in Seattle. But now with both of my university jobs and having recently bought my own condo, I feel like I'm bound to Chicago more than ever.

Maybe there's still something that needs to be done here before I can be free there. 

I haven't forgotten about you, dear Seattle. I hope you haven't forgotten about me either...

Friday, November 4, 2016

Hey Chicago, what do you say?

You've probably already heard the terrible news.

The worst and unimaginable thing has happened.

Brace yourselves.

The Chicago Cubs won this year's World Series!!!

Those of you who have followed past posts of mine know I LOATHE the Cubs. I've had to deal with their drunk fans for years and they turned me off to the team.

I give the team credit though. They used to consistently lose but with new management (and new players) these last couple of years, the Cubs rose to the top, winning game 7 this past Wednesday.

Everybody would break out into this song throughout the week!

Normally I'm bored by baseball but I ended up watching most of this year's Division, Championship, and then World Series games. I found them to be exciting and stressful. I'd swear at the TV whenever the Cubs would get a hit and cheer when the opposing team would be winning (some games were sooooo close). Who knew watching baseball could be such a roller coaster ride!

My coworkers (die-hard fans) would get mad whenever I'd say I hope the Cubs lose, so instead I started saying, "May the best team win." And in the end that proved to be the much as it pains me to admit that.

The World Series parade was held here in Chicago today. Even though I was at work during most of it, I was able to watch it streaming live from my computer. An estimated 5 million people attended the celebration and it was non-stop noise and cheering from the city streets down below.

My stomach turned at the sight and sound of all those dressed in white and blue and red jerseys but in the end I'm happy for the fans. I know they wanted it badly (108 years in the making) and it was a shared, historic event for the city I was born and raised in.

So congrats to you, dear Cubs. Dye our river blue, fly the W, and drink your copious amounts of beer. You earned this victory.

Bask in it while you can because we all know you won't win again for a long, Long, LONG time after this.


Tuesday, November 1, 2016

Happy Anniversary to her.

When I arrived at my university job tonight there were flowers sitting in the back office space. A heart-shaped balloon bobbed from the bouquet's protective cellophane exterior. 

My heart skipped a beat. Who were they for? 

The boyfriend of my Tuesday-night student worker got them for her. Today was the two-year anniversary of when they first met. How very sweet.

She read me the card nestled among the red roses and soft Peruvian lilies: 

"Two years ago was one of the best days of my life. You showed me the meaning of love. A blessing sent from above, you're forever engraved in my heart, baby. Te amo mi amor."

"You're blessed to have that, especially at such a young age," I told her (she turns 21 later this month). "Some people wait their whole lives and never find it." (Like myself).

I'm happy for her. She's a very sweet and kind girl. She deserves it and so much more.

My heart longs for love that lasts but as I get older with each passing year, I know my chances keep dwindling. At least I get to see love exists in the world even if I can't have it myself. 

Happy Anniversary, Araceli and Brandon!! Here's to many more!